It's been a busy busy last couple weeks, filled with highs and lows. Some of the highlights have been the countless little moments that I thought to myself "If only I could freeze time..."
I've been so incredibly blessed to be able to do all kinds of fun things with our girls from trips to the park, duck pond, pool, restaurants or simply picnicking in the backyard. It's been so fun to watch them enjoy sisterhood, often ushering each other into make-belief land where they start their day with different names and together we create a storyline that carries us through the day sometimes. The compassion they are learning, the thoughtfulness and the increased ability to share and take care of one another is enough to make this momma's heart melt.
Then there are days when I say to myself, "I must be doing something wrong"...
The days where they seemingly ignore every instruction I give them and whine from the minute they wake up until their exhausted little heads hit the pillow (if I'm lucky at nap time). Thankfully, these days are getting fewer and with Emily being fully potty trained and Kara becoming more and more of an independent "Mommy helper", my life as a Mom generally seems to be getting easier.
I am keenly aware that I likely have just 3 months left of this 'easier' mommyhood. For the first time in 3.5 years I have enjoyed many undisturbed quiet times in the wee hours of the morning while the girls watch their morning movie. These times sipping my decaf coffee ;) from the cozy familiar comfort of my "quiet time" chair have been so life giving. They have created in me this renewed hunger and thirst for more of my heavenly father- more of his thoughts, his heart, and his transforming hand in my life. Recently, my entire day seems to be speckled with thoughts, ideas and plans that are not my own. Thoughts about how to care more deeply, live more selflessly and act more obediently in response to his heart for the people around me. My heart has continues to break for the lost, hurting, neglected, abused, and hopeless people that I read about, hear about, and meet daily. The last couple weeks have been a rush of blessings as I look at my own sweet little ones, yet I have felt so burdened for the many other kids around the world who don't have a daddy singing to them at bedtime (something I adore about Dave). Little ones who aren't cuddled, kissed or prayed over before they fall asleep each night- or worse, children who have never experienced any loving touch at all. So this week I registered for a conference... one that as far as I know, I'll be attending alone in Surrey, BC. But this conference is one that came to my inbox rather randomly and yet quite clearly as a prompting to continue to take action, to continue to learn about God's heart for these little ones. I don't know what the future will hold for our family. Frankly, there are days when I'm scared to see what God has planned for our family. Most days though, I am so thankful, so completely and totally grateful that God continues to give me just the tiniest glimpses of what breaks his heart. I know I haven't got a hope of living out what he might ask me to do if it weren't for his continued conviction, strength and guidance, so that's where I find myself.... desperately clinging to his word and to this gift of increased time spent with him.
On the lighter side.... here are some pictures of just a few of our highs with our little ladies.
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These little ladies and their love for "reading" are the reason why we make weekly trips to the library... |
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All ready for church in their new hats made by Adopted Auntie, Gail |
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Best buds |
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Pretending to sleep |
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Giggling after being discovered |
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Hiding on Mommy |
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4 Little girlies to keep an eye on this day. Each one of them took a "potty break" while we were at the duck pond that morning :) |
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Kara and Norah are two peas in a pod or squirrels in a tree :) |
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Later that day, a tea party for Norah's birthday that we missed while away in Whistler. |
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We met up with Daddy at a carnival we found on our way home from the tea party! |
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Big sister took the wheel on the second trip! |
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Emily loved the ferris wheel! |
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Hot wheels was a favourite ride that they did all by themselves! |
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A year ago Kara wasn't too sure about Merry-go-Rounds, but our big girl is getting brave and ran straight to a pony |
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Emily wasn't as keen and settled on cuddling on the sleigh |
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View from the top of Elk just before sun down |
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Epic hike with Kevin, Dave and Kara (Em and I napped at home) |
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Kara and "uncle" Kevin. He's a personal favourite of Kara and Emily's :) Crazy that it is very much spring just a hike away! |
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Lunch date with Mommy at Burger King, when it rains for days non-stop indoor parks are essential |
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Emily trying out Mommies new shoes
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And although I hate to conclude with a seemingly obvious low.... we are homesick. Missing our family and friends who are like family more than ever right now during this gloomy rainy season. Today Kara said to me, not once or twice but three times, "Mommy, when are we going to go back to our old house where we meet our family and friends all the days? I liked it when we lived near Brandon and Katy better...."
Say a little prayer for my sweet spirited three year old who- despite an exciting week, still very dearly misses her family and friends.